Janette Beatrice Boonstoppel's Obituary
Sometime around August 21, our mom, Janette (Jan) Boonstoppel (née Tolman), died at her home in Taylorsville, Utah. She was 78 years old.
Born May 12, 1947, in Oakland, CA, to Russell Jarvis Tolman and Minnie Tolman (née Leone), our mom was the oldest of five children that included Russ, Gary, Denise, and Kurt. She graduated from De Anza High School in 1965, and had her first child, Robbie, a couple of years later. She met her second husband, Bob, at the Oakland Army Base shortly after he returned from Vietnam. They married in 1970 and lived in Richmond, CA, while Bob completed law school. Shortly after the birth of their daughter, Sarah, Bob returned to active-duty service with the Army and took Jan, Robbie, and Sarah to Hawaii, where David was born in 1975. When Jan and her family returned to the mainland, they lived in Charlottesville, VA, Fort Leonard Wood, MO, and Dumfries, VA. She later lived in Baltimore, MD, and Grand Rapids, MI, before finally moving to Taylorsville, UT, where she lived near her siblings.
Our mom had some pretty neat jobs. After working at the Oakland Army Base in the early 1970s, she was a homemaker for several years before returning to work as a bookkeeper at K&K Toys (later KayBee Toys) at the Springfield Mall in Virginia (I remember being with her when she saw the help-wanted sign in the window just as the store was closing). She also worked briefly as a cook at a local preschool, where she swore the kids loved her erwtensoep– a Dutch split pea soup based on a family recipe (which was, indeed, so delicious). After her marriage to Bob ended, she returned to KayBee Toys and was promoted to manager, working at several store locations in the Baltimore-Washington Area over the years. This work suited her well– she was well-organized, loved silliness and children, and appreciated a good collection. All toy store managers should share such qualities.
Our mom was a great mom. She was funny and loving and creative. She helped us recognize our strengths and encouraged us to be curious and to pursue our talents. She gave great hugs and cooked fantastic spaghetti with meat sauce. She was our friend and our critic. She shared with us her love for animals, and shared her heart with several dogs, cats, and birds throughout her life. She loved flowers (daisies and black-eyed susans were her among favorites) and fresh fruits and vegetables, and she loved telling us about the fresh California tomatoes she ate like apples as a child. Our mom cried when Elvis came on the radio.
Our mom had talents she herself often overlooked. She was a brilliant artist that could capture emotion and character with whatever media she had available. She was an extraordinary gardener, and she beautified the neighborhoods she lived in. While living in Baltimore, she talked several of her neighbors into letting her expand her vegetable and flower garden into their rowhome yards, leading to her endearing nickname “Lily” or “Garden Lilly” among her children and neighbors. She learned to play the accordion as a child, performing “Send in the Clowns” at a talent show, and though she rarely played for us, we are certain she was brilliant.
Our mom touched many lives through her service with her church, her work, and her warmth. She was known for her wonderful hugs, her infectious smile, and her openness to anyone in need. She always offered compassion and empathy, and she could always make friends.
Our mom Jan is survived by us, Robyn Lee, Sarah, and David; and two grandchildren, Abigail and Elizabeth. She is also survived by her brothers Russ, Gary, and Kurt, and her sister Denise. She is preceded in death by her parents, R.J. and Minnie Tolman, her dog Hannah, her cat Luka, and a lifetime of dogs, cats, and birds before them.
We are grateful to everyone who knew her and cared for her and cherished her in her final years. In her memory, we encourage everyone to hug your mom, hug your dad, hug your kids, hug anyone you love, and hug them every chance you get.
Despite the distance between us, we always feel her love through her gifts to us– our own humor, creativity, and love for animals– and see it in our faces and our laughter (though none of us snort at a good joke the way she did). She takes our love with her as
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