M J
Mom was my best friend. Oh, I have great friends who aren't related to me, but mom was just that much closer. She was always there for me, unless she happened to be visiting my sister Michelle in Texas, but that was to be expected. Mom had not only a daughter there, but grandkids and great grandkids. They called her "granny".
Mom was the most social person I have ever known. She loved going to high school reunions, mission reunions, family reunions, or any other kind of union/reunion. She was always up for visiting anybody at any time. Her siblings and their children were dear to her. She had 22 nieces and nephews, and could remember all of their birthdays. I know, because I quizzed her.
She grew up in Sanpete County, Utah, during the Great Depression, in one of the poorest families in town. And yet, to hear her tell it, she had a happy childhood. She loved to share stories about her childhood, and many of them are amusing.
Here's one:
When she was a young girl, she got some shoes that had bells on them. One day, while walking down the street in Ephraim, some boys walked past her. One of the boys, who was chubby, said, "Well, look at that. She has bells on her shoes", in a very mocking tone. My mother promptly said, "Yes I have bells on my shoes, and you have fat on your bones. I can take off the bells. Can you take off your fat?" The other boys laughed, and informed the porky kid that he'd been had.
She was ambitious. Back in the 50s, her mother (my grandmother) told her there was no need to go to college--that she should just find a nice man and get married. Mom stubbornly resisted that piece of advice, and paid her own way to attend BYU, where she majored in French and minored in English. She worked at the Provo Telephone Company to earn money. She also went on a mission to Europe, back when missions weren't a common thing for women.
So much family lore was buried with mom. She knew many things about her family and extended family, both the good and the bad.
Mom was fiercely independent. In her later years she lived alone, and drove until the age of 92. Once, during the Covid era, the family hadn't heard from her, so the police were tasked with a welfare check. When mom answered the door and saw the policeman, she said, "Oh, you finally caught me." The officer laughed and said, "What did you do"? Mom said "I threw snow into the library when I was 12."
Mom was generous to a fault, and had trouble telling people no. On one occasion, she saw a rather destitute individual (or panhandler), and sought to give that person a $10 bill. As she extended the money, she noticed it was $100 bill, but she just couldn't bring herself to pull the money back. That was mom in a nutshell. She didn't always pay attention to detail, but she was very dialed in when it came to the bigger, more important things.
Mom took very good care of her teeth, and taught her children to do the same. She had her natural teeth her whole life. Incredibly, she didn't need hearing aids until her last two years. Her vision was also excellent. She only used glasses to read. She used to joke that she would be buried with her own teeth, her own ears, her own eyes, and her own wig.
Politics and religion were of paramount concern to mom, and she was very active in both. She wrote many letters to the editors of newspapers on the subject of politics. As to religion, her faith was strong, and she was quick to credit God for her successes.
After Abraham Lincoln’s death, his law partner William Herndon told a person interviewing him that Abraham had said, “all I am or can be I owe to my angel-mother.” I feel the same way about my mother.
Rest in peace, mom.
Love,
Mark
